Friday, December 21, 2007

Yes, we're blond, but that doesn't mean we're stupid...

Scene 1:

Last Sunday Gawain made fried scones for us, used a little too much oil and spilled some under the burner on the stove. Vesper, in the course of trying to move overfilled pan of oil, also spilled some under the burner. Both Vesper and Gawain, b/c said burner was still hot, forgot to clean out from under the plate after it had cooled down.

Scene 2:

Last night, Gawain turns on burner on stove with oil still under, and decides it will burn off, there isn't that much.

He then goes to get ready for his shower since he just got back from a run.

Vesper is lounging around on the couach, feeling bloaty and preggo after a long day at work. She is going to go into the kitchen and start making hashbrowns on the stove that is heating up as soon as Gawain stops talking to her and jumps in the shower.

Vesper (looking at direction of kitchen, noticing smoke and also a flickering light against the fridge): (screaming like crazy) THE KITCHEN IS ON FIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Gawain, who is naked from trying to jump in the shower, quickly runs after the screaming Vesper into the kitchen. Both are horrified to find a rather large fire raging off of the oily hot plate! Vesper can only think quickly (read panic) about what should be done. Gawain grabs the largest pan they have and trys to suffocate the fire, which doesn't work. Vesper wonders if they should just close the stove (it is an old oven and the stove actually fits like a drawer right under the oven), but worries the whole oven will then explode. Gawain, worried about being naked while fighting a fire, yells at Vesper to grab baking soda and pour it all over the fire. Vesper springs into action, grabs the bakng soda, and pours it all over the fire, dousing the flames.

Gawain: This makes me think about that time, in the scriptures, that that lady stabbed someone in the head and they said that she "smote" off his head. That's like you saying the kitchen is on fire, but really only the stove was on fire.

Vesper: Huh???? Our house almost burned down!!! How can you talk about that stuff at a time like this?!?!?!?!?

Gawain: (still naked) Um, I don't know, I'm jumping in the shower.


Marie said...

Oh my WORD -- this is one for the ages. I'm glad no one's naughty bits caught fire.

This reminds me of when I was two (I don't actually remember it, but my parents like to tell the tale) and put a bobby pin in a wall socket, setting off sparks that lit the carpet on fire. My mother screams "FIRE!" and my dad, just OUT of the shower, runs out into the hallway and stomps on it with his bare feet, burning them.

It would seem that a humorous house fire story is one of the perks of marriage. I'm looking forward to it.

Gawain said...

Well, at least he just burned his feet.