The price is right!

In an effort to help us Gawain win the Biggest Loser competition , I have been trying to buy more veggies and fruits. Just 5 servings is an easy one point. Actually we really like veggies and fruits any way, and tried to eat plenty before the competition. I'm sure you know that they aren't exactly cheap.

Enter Lee's Market.

A couple of months ago we were at a party and some friends told us about this market where all of the produce is really, really cheap. Like they had bought 2 avocados for like a dollar. Dude! I had just bought one avocado that day for like 2 dollars! They said that it was in White Center and I should check it out.

Ok, I have a confession to make. I am TOTALLY TERRIFIED of White Center.

Yes, it is basically only 2 blocks from my house, but seriously, it is like one of the ghettos of Seattle. You only have to say "White Center" and people you are talking to are like "Ohhh...." like "Oh dear I can't believe you are still alive." Like seriously, in the first couple of months that we lived here, our car was broken into 3 times, the second time, the stereo and speakers were stolen and the third time the starter was destroyed in an effort to start and steal the car. The main drag of white center has at least 3 porno shops, which like to display the nativity scene at Christmas time and there is just overall general seedy-ness. I hate to stereotype, but, there you go.

ANYWAY, I decided since times are tough and money is tight I would overcome my fear and go to this Lee's market and check out the produce.

Pictured below is a typical trip to the market. Please guess how much I spent.

Go on, guess!

Can you believe everything pictured above (except the dog) was only $9.10???? I'm serious! I can barely believe it myself!

It works like so:

Already bagged things are $1.25. Anything not bagged is either 3 for a $1 or 2 for $1 or some insanely cheap amount per lb. In fact, I go in there so often, sometimes the nice lady behind the counter just lets me have stuff for free (like a single jalapeno pepper or a tiny little thing of ginger). There is a catch, in that they don't always have the same things (like for a while they had a giant bag of romaine hearts for $1.25, haven't seen that in a while) but if you aren't picky they have lots of stuff to enjoy. The best thing we've found twice now is a bag of about 50 key limes for $1.25. at the store 1 lb (about 30 limes) is 4.99, and it takes 22 limes to make our favorite dessert. The quality is actually suprisingly good for the price you are paying. I see them outside pulling off the bad bits of lettuce and bok choy and just putting the good stuff in bags. They may be smoking while they are doing it, but hey, I wash it all of when I get home anyway, right?

Here's to hoping you have something as equally awesome in a ghetto neighborhood close to you!

Words can't even describe....

Sunday night, Vesper recieves a text from Gawain, who is on  a walk with Froggy:

Call me as soon as you are done feeding the Professor

Vesper, concerned that something is wrong, quickly calls Gawain

Vesper:  What's wrong is everything ok?

Gawain:  (Can barely talk from laughing) You will never belive what I just saw

Vesper:  What?

Gawain:  I was walking by that house on the corner and I can't be sure, but I think I saw the two people who live there having sex!!!!

Vesper: WHA?!?!?

Gawain:  I know!  All I could see was the girl but she was *moving* like she was on top of someone..and she had her shirt on.  I didn't want to be a pervert because I had already stood there and stared in disbelief for like 10 seconds so I kept walking

Vesper:  Holy Crap!  That is hilarious!  Maybe she's comforting him for Arizona losing the  Super Bowl....

Praise the Lord!

My sister lives in Georgia, you know, in the middle of the bible belt.  She sees crazy religious stuff all the time.  Gawain, being somewhat into religion, always finds these things rather interesting and hilarious.  My sister found this, thought Gawain would love it, sent it to us, and this is what it said:

I know, right?  

You'll never believe what I found in my work bathroom

So I'm in my bathroom at work, you know, going to the bathroom whan I look down and see something sticking out from under the shelf of extra toilet paper.

Doth my eyes decieve me??????  Is that what I think it is?  You bet your butt it is!

(no I didn't touch it with my bare hands)

Yes that is a genuine lacy peach thong.  It leaves one to ponder the following questions...

• Who is running around the office with no panties on?????
• Why did they stash it under the shelf in the bathroom used by 6 other women???
• Why didn't they hide it better????

The facts are these....on that particular day there were 6 other women working that use this bathroom.  There is also a cleaning lady that comes on Tuesdays and Thursdays...a tawdry after hours sex affair?

That was last Thursday.  Cursing myself that I didn't have a camera to capture something too good to be true I just had to enjoy telling Gawain about it....through text message in the bathroom.  Later that day I cursed myself further...duh do I not posess a CAMERA phone??

Today, Tuesday, the thong was still there!  Squeling with glee I quickly took the above pictures. Unable to keep such jucy gossip to myself, I finally consulted the front office manager, Crusty, to ask her if it was hers, and if not had she seen it?  She admitted that she had, in  fact, seen it the day before (last Wednesday) but had forgotten to mention it to anyone else to see who its owner was.  She too thought there might be a tawdry sex affair of the cleaning lady after hours.  We finally decided that it may have been stuck in someone's laundry and dropped on the floor when someone was changing into their scrubs for work (seriously......who wears a sexy thong to work when they work with 5 other women and wear scrubs all day!?)

As of this post I still don't know its origins...I will keep you posted as the mystery is solved (hopefully!)

In which we recieve the worst corking of our lives

On Friday, the Professor, Gawain, Froggy, and I all enjoyed a nice evening at Green Lake. The weather was beautiful, although a little chilly, and it was nice to be together. The only problem was that Professor X was coming down with a cold, and coughing, and making me quite anxious to finish the 2.8 mile loop around the lake and get him in the nice warm car and home. Once in the car, we stopped at Kidd Valley and enjoyed some burgers and a shake in the car, and then proceeded home. We decided to cut through the city because there was horrible Mariners traffic on our usual way home.

Lucky for us, while stopped at a red light, we noticed a huge entourage of bikers going through the intersection. We realized it was some biking club that went through the city every month. Last year, we had seen them with some of our friends and one of the bikers was riding his bike NAKED! I sat up a little straighter and tried to pay attention so that I could tell my friend if I saw anything crazy. Our light turned from red, to green, and the bikers continued to go through the intersection. Gawain started getting impatient. It was a green light, and the Professor was coughing more and more. We were both a little anxious to get our precious 4 week old home. The light turns from green, to red, and we wait again for the next green light. When it comes, the bikers are still riding through. Gawain decides he's had enough, and goes around the line up of cars to get through the intersection. As we get there, instantly 5 or 6 bikers swarm around us, enraged that we would try and cross the intersection while their demonstration was going through. "ITS A GREEN LIGHT!!" yells Gawain. The bikers just look at him angrily, like they have no idea what language he is speaking or what on earth he is talking about.

As the last of the bikers go through the intersection, a couple of the our detainees yell "thanks for your patience" and follow the rest of the group. Both Gawain and I are mad! That was soooo dumb! Gawain is out for blood. He confesses that it was all he could do NOT to hit one of the bikers and knock them over. Once home, we consult the internet and discover that the group is called Critical Mass and they do their ride the last Friday of every month. What they did to us is called "Corking" and it is technically illegal! Gawain has decided next month, he is going to borrow his dad's huge truck and trailer and cork them at every intersection. Now, when ever we see a biker, on TV or in real life, both Gawain and I get a little flare of anger in our hearts over how retarded that group was to us. So much for upholding the groups' m.o. of teaching tolerance for bike riders!

Reminiscing on the Coming Spring

Those of you who have or do live in Washington will understand the cruelty of February. In the midst of the gray and cold, many February's offer up one week of false hope that spring has arrived. Amazing and beautiful blue skies accompanied by temperatures in their 60's, or upper 50's at the least. If you don't watch yourself, you will end up with a jagged razor pressed to your inner arms by March when the cold and gray return and dominate until very late Spring...and then the gray sticks around until the end of July. Well, Vesper and I are no fools. When we saw and felt this February's weather ignis fatuus we threw Froggy in the car and boogied on down to Lincoln Park to soak up as much of the goodness as we could before it all blew away like a cruel dream.

Froggy was very excited and more than a bit impatient for Vesper to join him on the trail.

As seen in the picture we were not the only ones with the foresight to take advantage of the brief respite.

We even found this fantastic drift wood fort on the beach. (Complete with dried Christmas Tree...for instant fiery death!)

The weather even made the ferries look appealing. (Though the fleet is full of ancient, rusting, cracking death traps)

Lest you become too jealous of the visual and sensual satisfaction that was heaped upon us on this warm summer day...well...let's just say that there was at least one large crack in the perfect day's facade.

And yes...there was even an evil eye sighting that made all hobits run for cover.

But not even these affronts to decency and goodness could keep Froggy down from enjoying this wonderful day.

As an aside...Vesper and I received honorable mention in Marie's St. Patrick's Day Limerick Contest. Take a jaunt on over there to see the fantastic silliness.

THE MUSIC WAS SO LOUD I PUKED ALL OVER MYSELF!!

This week was officially Harry Potter week for Vesper and I. We saw the new movie and events on Tuesday night, and on Friday the 13th (insert scream here) we attended a Harry and the Potters wizard rock show at the Seattle Public Library with Isabel, The King, and Baboo. Also attending were a couple of my old coworkers and their friends. So, with our group of 10 we were set to help battle the forces of evil, namely, Lord Voldemort.

To ensure top performance and enjoyment of the show Vesper and I met Isabel, The King, and Baboo at the Westlake Center foodcourt. After fueling up we then made the 5 block stroll to the Library. The doors opened for the show (Which was in a library! How cool is that?) at 7pm and we arrived at 6:30PM. The line was already starting to snake around the building by the time we got there.

There were the usual cast of dressed up characters in attendance. From the Professor McGonagall hand puppet to a pair of fully garbed house elves. I guess it only makes sense since all 700-800 of us were there to see a trio of rockers dressed up like Harry Potter 4th year, Harry Potter 7th year, and baby Hagrid. Once we got inside while merchandise was being purchased and the crowd was waiting for the show to begin I wandered around and took some pictures.

(I know that this isn't a Harry Potter get-up, but I enjoyed the sperm guitars attempting to impregnate a LP)

(Vesper and I both appreciated that this kid even nailed the Stan Shunpike expression)

The Seattle Public library is a great venue to have a show. The main floor that we were all on is a series of diamond windows (I'm sure there's a proper word for the structure, but I don't know it) and our beautiful city was the backdrop for the show. Now, I know Harry and the Potters plays shows in libraries and other civic buildings all over the country, but I have to imagine that there is no better venue, or crowd (they mentioned it was their largest of this tour) they encounter.

(One view of the city. On many of the other shots taken within the library, you can see the city in the background.)

(The crowd milling around before the show.)

After a while chants of "Harry, Harry" began to break out and before long everyone's wizard heroes emerged on stage.

As you can see the Harrys emerged in full Hogwarts gear. Their opening number was "Voldermort Can't Stop the Rock". After the opener they had a "2 year old baby Hargrid" join them on the drums to fill out their 3-piece punk group. Due to the immense wizard heat they were putting off the sweaters were quickly shed and madness, only the likes of which you see when a rock show is played in a library, ensued.

(Notice the mic chord wrapped around the head of the Harry on the left)

If pictures aren't enough for you we even took a couple of quick videos with our camera. The sound was removed because it was all fuzz. (This show was LOUD. And, like all mediocre sound systems, the treble was far too high. The high-hat and crash cymbal were out for blood...dribbling from our ear drums.) Video

Isabel and family took off about an hour into the show because, quite frankly, Baboo was uber-tired and I'm sure that the piercing treble was not good for his tender little ears. But, those who stuck around (Us and my old coworkers) were in for quite the treat. Seeking to live up to the good Harry Potter name, the Harrys stuck around a signed merchandise and took photos with those who were patient enough to get to them, and not bothered by sweaty fake wizards.

(From left to right: Ms. Logic, Vesper, HP4, Gawain)

(Note from Vesper: How cool for HP4 that he is having people clamoring for his autograph and a picture! How cool for us, his fans, that we actually get to meet one of the lead singers of a band, get an autograph, and get a pic taken! I bet I could never in my lifetime get to do that with The Edge.)

All in all the show was a grand time. Lots of crowd participation, and humorous lyrics based on the books. If you have read the Harry Potter books and Harry and the Potters ever make it to your neck of the woods, attendance is a must. You will have a blast.

(From left to right: Ms Logic, Vesper, Gawain, Meg, Phinneas, Vivika, Matthew. And honestly, the person who took this picture is lame. Who doesn't get the entire name of the library?)

Flight of the Phoenix

To commemorate going to the 12:01AM showing of “Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix” at the IMAX theater in Seattle I decided to keep a running journal of the evenings events. (ala Bill Simmons) Between the beautiful weather, using a flex car convertible Mini Cooper, Jihan and Staton joining us, and the rabid Harry Potter fans I had high hopes for an entertaining evening. (As a note I would like to point out that all of the driving portions of this journal were recorded after the fact.) (To view all the photos from this night's adventures visit Flickr)

8:00 PM – Left the house for the movie. Still feeling a bit surly from my nap. It feels like it might be one of those times where it takes a couple of hours to shake it off.

8:06 PM – Just noticed that our car has an ungodly amount of sap on it. Why do some trees pee so much?

8:30 PM – Finally got into the car. I think Vesper may start lactating she is so excited for the Mini Cooper. (She has wanted to buy one FOREVER and this is the first time that we have ever driven one.) 8:50 PM - Just passed one of our favorite store front displays on 99. Behold! The lightup wheelchair! 8:56 PM – Almost caused an accident taking a picture of Vesper driving the Mini Cooper. For some reason on the one picture I decide to take straight on of her the flash goes off, momentarily blinding her.

9:03 PM – This is one of those warm summer nights where the air just feels wonderful.

9:08 PM – Still feeling surly. I’m not sure what it’s going to take to pull me out of this.

9:21 PM – Listening to “Black Holes and Revelations” by Muse on 4th and Seneca downtown with the top down. The air temperature 87 degrees, a warm breeze is blowing, and the city looks beautiful. It doesn’t get much better than this.

9:28 PM – Got back to the Flexcar spot in time and the gas gauge is just this side of a quarter full. Love it when that happens.

9:37 PM – While driving from Belltown to Seattle Center Vesper squeals and noticed that they’ve turned the 7-11 into a Kwik-E Mart. 9:46 PM – Back at the Kwik-E Mart taking pictures. I can’t believe how much glee I’m getting from a bunch of cut-outs of Simpsons characters and Krusty-O’s cereal. 9:52 PM – We are in line at the IMAX and raring to go. We can’t wait until Jihan and Staton get here. Their ETA is currently 11PM. 9:56 PM – Some dufus in plain clothes is walking up and down the line trying to sell pizzas in unmarked boxes. $1 for an entire pizza. $.25 for a slice. No thanks. I prefer a sedate and orderly digestive tract.

10:02 PM – Got antsy and walked up to the front of the line. The 2 girls in front got here at 3:30 this afternoon, when it was still 93 degrees outside. (The temperature would be like if Topeka had a high temp of 783 degrees. This heat is just unheard of prior to August) They said they were the only ones in the line until 5PM or so. 10:06-10:15 PM – Walking around taking pictures. There is a very Halloween feel to a lot of the female costume wearers tonight. The theme seems to be “Slaggy Hogwarts Girl Extraordinaire”.

10:18 PM - Is that a seance?

10:23 PM – Just got done speaking with Jamie. She’s the one in the red Gryffindor Quidditch robes, Quidditch arm guards, sweet broom, goggles, Gryffindor sweater and boots. Let me tell you, they teach some good things at the drama department a Western Washington University. She made everything on her body except the Gryffindor patch on her robes and the goggles. - Broom: Walking stick procured from her Scout master father combined with straightened wreaths from Jo-Ann’s.
- Arm Guards: Made them from scratch herself.
- Robe: Bought a sewing machine for the express purpose of making these robes.
- Sweater: Knitted it herself.
- Simply an insane amount of time poured into a Harry Potter outfit.

10:30 PM – We have our first tired tuckus alert. Had to run back to the car to get a jacket for Vesper to sit on. My underlying surliness is still present. I’ve been awake for 3 ½ hours.

10:46 PM – Vesper is bored enough to make videos on my cell phone of us disapparating. (Here they are on YouTube -- Vesper – Gawain) Surliness, petulance, and impatience are unleashed. Glad the Vesper loves me enough to put up with my crap. The movies turn out pretty well though.

10:50 PM – We have identified a Class-1 Alpha-Bitch directly behind us in line. We cannot understand why none of her teeny-bopper friends is pimp-slapping her.

10:55 PM – Everyone starts cheering as line the begins to move, then stands around for 13 minutes to wait for the line to move again.

10:57 PM – Apparently Jihan and Staton feel asleep and lost track of the time. They are just leaving Bellevue for Seattle now.

10:59 PM – Determine that no matter what it is time for the surliness to depart.

11:07 PM – Alpha-Bitch’s toy wand sounds suspiciously like a light saber when swished and flicked.

11:08 PM – Line starts moving for real. Surliness gone, a blessing for everyone involved.

11:10 PM – Going to a movie at IMAX is so much more fun than going to a regular theater. Since they don’t show feature films very often, when they do they go all out. (See pictures below) The decorations, staff and facilities, were awesome. It’s also very nice to be able to listen to real music and not have to watch the same stupid ‘20’ before the movie. 11:15 PM – Vesper and I have to split. She’ll wait for J&S outside while I go and find seats.

11:18 PM – That was quick. J&S have arrived.

11:20 PM – I have finally ceased to sweat.

11:30 PM – These IMAX 3D glasses are righteous! 11:45 PM – I may have knocked over my popcorn, glasses, and almost the soda; but I caught a Dumbledore’s Army hat for my love.

11:50 PM – Wow. The stats on this (and I imagine all) IMAX theater are impressive. All figures are for Order of the Phoenix.
- 12,000 watts of sound.
- 18 miles of film
- The film weights 1,000 lbs.
- The screen is 6 stories high.

12:01 AM – The previews begin.

12:03 AM – I almost feel nauseous watching this “Dinosaurs Alive” preview in 3D. Seriously disorienting.

12:05 AM – Okay. Now I’m used to it.

12:06 AM – The movie has begun!!

2:24 AM – The movie is over. Overall it was great. The entire trip to and fight at the Ministry of Magic was in 3D. Once I got used to the 3D it was pretty incredible. The threstrals looked kind of funky in 3D though.

3:04:23 AM – Climb on top of bed and underneath ceiling fan.

3:04:27 AM – Fast asleep.

6:15AM – Please kill me! Don't make me wake up! I want to die!